Help is on the way

Not only is help on the way, but it’s also surrounding us all the time.

In my experience, to find out for sure, you just have to ask for it.

Years ago, I longed to attend a leadership conference but the tuition was far greater than I could afford. I asked the organizers for a reduced fee and they said, “yes.”

Recently, one of my students cold-called a contact on LinkedIn and asked for an informational interview. The response was, “Sure, how about right now?”

I mentioned to a friend that I wanted to line up a speaker for one of my classes. She referred me to a colleague who, on short notice, said “Yes!” right away.

Maybe these are exceptions, anomalies in a cynical and selfish world.

Maybe not.

I believe that they are accurate representations of the truth that most people, most of the time will be of help if they are able.

Our job is to ask for it. And our job, when we’re on the other side of the equation is to be the ones who say “yes!”


DAVID BERRY is the author of “A More Daring Life: Finding Voice at the Crossroads of Change” and the founder of RULE13 Learning. He speaks and writes about the complexity of leading in a changing world.

Courage Begets Courage

Yesterday, I wrote about trying something new as the result of the shared support and accountability that can emerge between trusted friends. Having put myself “on the hook” I felt a strong obligation to them and to myself to follow through. What I didn’t share is that I am not the only of us to take new actions, new risks, as a result of our collaboration.

One friend designed and led a one-day retreat she had been longing to offer. She issued the invitation and many said “yes.”

Another friend enrolled her boss in a difficult conversation about redesigning her work schedule to make her well-being a higher priority. The answer was, “yes.”

While none of us would claim direct responsibility for the other’s courageous step, we feel a profound sense of shared responsibility for the listening, the encouragement and celebration for the other’s follow-through.

Your courage is my courage. And it is her courage and his courage, and then mine again, even greater now.

That’s the gift of connection between trusted friends.


DAVID BERRY is the author of “A More Daring Life: Finding Voice at the Crossroads of Change” and the founder of RULE13 Learning. He speaks and writes about the complexity of leading in a changing world.

What do you mean, it’s over?

Didn’t we just get here?

Well, yes, but there’s been a lot going on.

It just seems too soon.

Yeah, to me too. But this is it.

I gotta tell you, I just don’t feel ready for what’s next.

I know, it’s hard to feel ready when things are moving so fast.

I really mean it, I’m not ready.

I understand. It’s hard to go from knowing to doing, but this really is the time and we’ve got to go.

I wish I felt better, like I knew what was going to happen.

Someone once told me, “If you’re ready, you’ve waited too long.” I didn’t like it when I heard it but I realized that the thing that keeps me from acting isn’t my lack of ability but my negative opinion about my ability. Anyway, the clock is ticking…

Ok, then…how do I start?

Oh, that’s the best part: you say “thank you” to what’s been and “yes” to what’s to come.

I can do that.

I know you can.

Thank you.

Yes.


DAVID BERRY is the author of “A More Daring Life: Finding Voice at the Crossroads of Change” and the founder of RULE13 Learning. He speaks and writes about the complexity of leading in a changing world.

 

Welcome

To welcome something is to say “yes” to it. It is to encourage its existence and to join with it in a positive spirit of participation.

I choose this word as a companion to accompany me during these final celebratory and transitional weeks of this year. I think of it as a guidepost to which I can turn when preparing final grades, or decorating the house, or assisting in the wide variety of chores that will present themselves in the coming days.

I welcome the opportunity to read my student’s papers so that I can thoughtfully evaluate their work.

I welcome the opportunity to help prepare the meals that will serve as a centerpiece for our family’s celebrations.

I welcome the request to unpack the decorations and to work together to make our home an outward reflection of our inward beliefs.

I welcome the opportunity to offer to help when that offer is unexpected.

I welcome the opportunity to respond with ‘yes’ when the request I have received is unexpected.

I welcome the opportunity to create moments of connection in the busyness; periods of reflection in the push to get it all done.

I welcome the chance to live into the simple, meaningful lessons of this season of giving; to receive what comes in the spirit of friendship; to start with “yes.”

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DAVID BERRY is the author of “A More Daring Life: Finding Voice at the Crossroads of Change” and the founder of RULE13 Learning. He speaks and writes about the complexity of leading in a changing world. Connect with him on Twitter at @berrydavid.