I have a bad and potentially very dangerous habit. I frequently reach for my phone while driving. I’m not sure if it’s poor impulse control or the misguided belief that something SUPER IMPORTANT could be happening RIGHT NOW but I have a hard time letting that thing just sit there while I’m on the road.
Maybe I’m just one of the many people whose sense of self-importance has shot up with easy access and non-stop connection, every new message a shot of adrenaline to the ego that says: “There you are! Thank you for validating my existence! It’s been 7 minutes since someone contacted me and I was beginning to doubt my relevance in the world!”
With that kind of build-up it’s pretty tough when the message turns out to be : “please stop for eggs and milk” or “someone you haven’t talked to in 20 years just updated their status to ‘in a relationship’.” The elation of being “important” collapsing under the weight of the banal and the shockingly unnecessary.
A companion challenge I have is the belief that I have both the driving skills and the dexterity to multitask and get away with it. Unfortunately, every time I do get away with it I am only reinforcing a faulty belief system; a specific form of arrogance that I am all too happy to relinquish and that is likely much easier said than done.
This is the motivating fear that led me to this disclosure: that I will injure (kill?) myself or my family, and God only knows who else, because I had to know the score of the game, read a shopping list or delete more spam. Talk about senseless loss and a shitty legacy.
A fitting tombstone: He was well-informed.
As I become increasingly aware of the realities of my son’s journey into his teenage years I am more mindful of what I am modeling for him on all fronts. And you know as well as I do that when we start having serious conversations about him getting his driver’s license I am going to be unrelenting in my demand that he never text and drive.
Thankfully, I’ve still got some time to put together a track record I can be proud of and that will rescue me from the dangers of hypocrisy. Not only am I pledging to keep my hands off the phone while driving (to be clear, I’m talking specifically about reading and responding to texts and emails [and please don’t get me started on Siri]), I am enrolling my family to hold me accountable for doing so. While I’m sure they’ll do a great job – too good, probably – I’m also going to need your help as I’m frequently in the car alone.
If I update my status to “in the car” will you call and tell me all about your new relationship?
I’ve learned to put my phone in the trunk….or the passenger seat pocket.